Let’s face it, having a house full of little ones is a whirlwind. As a mom of five, ranging from one to eight years old, I can confidently say I’ve experienced the beautiful chaos that comes with a large family (at least during the younger years). There are days that feel like a never-ending loop of diaper changes, spilled milk, and bedtime battles. But amidst the craziness, there’s a deep sense of love, laughter, and a unique kind of accomplishment that only comes from raising a whole crew of tiny humans.

For eight years, I’ve been navigating the world of motherhood. This year marks a decade of marriage, and homeschooling our two older children, ages seven and eight, adds another layer to the juggling act. While I wouldn’t trade my ever-so-slightly-unruly bunch for anything, there have been times when I’ve felt utterly outnumbered.

If you’re a parent of multiples, or simply have a house full of little ones, you know the feeling. The constant demands, the never-ending need for attention, and the sheer volume of tiny humans can be overwhelming. But fear not, fellow mamas (and papas)! There are ways to thrive in the midst of the mayhem. Here are five strategies that I’ve found helpful in managing my own multi-child household:

1. Create a Schedule and Be Flexible

In a household with five young children, striking a balance between routine and flexibility is crucial. While predictable wake-up times, meal schedules, nap times, and bedtime routines provide a sense of security for the little ones, unexpected meltdowns, diaper changes, or creative bursts frequently happen multiple times a day, easily throw a perfectly planned day off course. This is where flexibility becomes key. Our mornings often begin with a structured homeschool sessions for my 7 and 8-year-olds, while the younger ones play nearby. However, I’ve learned to adapt the schedule based on everyone’s needs.

Create a schedule. Write it down, put it in your phone, create those alarms, and adjust when needed. Some days might involve sticking to the plan, while others might call for more free play or creative activities. This flexibility extends to my work-from-home life as well. I write my parenting and technology blog during nap times or after the kids are asleep, allowing me to fulfill my responsibilities while still being present for my children.

2. Delegate, Divide and Conquer

With a house full of little hands, teamwork is essential. Divvying up tasks with your spouse or partner is key. One person can manage bath time while the other tackles dinner prep. Encouraging independence in my children has been a game-changer. Encouraging independence in my children, especially as my older ones (ages seven and eight) become more capable, has been a game-changer. Depending on how old your oldest are, The older kids help with simple chores like setting the table, picking up toys, and even assisting their younger siblings with basic needs. Don’t be afraid to delegate age-appropriate tasks. It not only lightens your load but also nurture a sense of responsibility in your older children.

3. Prioritize Self-Care

Make time for activities that replenish your energy! It might not be a lot of time, but even listening to one song from your playlist can be a refreshing break from the echoes of your kids’ diaper-time tantrums. Self-care doesn’t have to be elaborate. Sometimes, it’s as simple as enjoying a quiet cup of coffee in the morning before the kids wake up or taking a short walk to clear your mind.

I’ve also found that connecting with other moms, whether through online communities or in-person meetups, provides a much-needed sense of support and camaraderie. Amidst the chaos of daily life, it’s crucial to prioritize self-care. This was a lesson I learned the hard way, especially after the birth of my youngest, who spent time in the NICU. The stress and exhaustion of that experience taught me the importance of taking care of myself so I can better care for my family.

4. Quality Time for All

Quality time with multiple young children isn’t about elaborate outings or expensive toys. It’s about weaving moments of connection into the everyday. Schedule dedicated one-on-one time, even if it’s just 15 minutes. Let each child choose the activity, be it building a blanket fort or reading their favorite book, two player their favorite video game, or turn chores into bonding experiences. During this special time, put away distractions and truly be present. Throughout the day, seize opportunities to connect. Bedtime stories become a chance to cuddle and chat. Car rides transform into mini-adventures filled with conversation and silly games. Even chores can be a chance to bond – let them help with age-appropriate tasks and give them your full attention while you work together. Remember, quality trumps quantity. IPut away distractions, listen actively, and cherish the simple moments of connection that make them feel loved.

5. Lower your expectations

Instead of picturing a spotless house and perfectly behaved children, embrace the beautiful chaos that comes with this stage of life. Young children are naturally curious, energetic, and sometimes unruly. By setting more attainable goals, you can reduce stress and create a more positive environment for both yourself and your children. Focus on what’s truly important: the well-being and happiness of your children, rather than maintaining an idealized vision of family life. Accept that the house might be messier than you’d like or that meals might not always be gourmet. This shift in perspective can help you to be more present and engaged with your children, fostering stronger bonds and more meaningful interactions.

Realistic expectations can help mitigate feelings of guilt and inadequacy. Parenting, especially with multiple young children, is rife with moments of self-doubt. By acknowledging that it’s impossible to do everything perfectly, you give yourself permission to make mistakes and learn from them. This self-compassion not only benefits you but also sets a positive example for your children.

In essence, lowering your expectations when managing multiple young children is about embracing the chaos with grace and humor. Understand that each day will bring its own surprises and that it’s okay if not everything goes according to plan. By doing so, you create a more relaxed, joyful, and nurturing environment where both you and your children can thrive. Happy parents lead to happier kids, and that’s a win for everyone.

Raising a large family is a beautiful and challenging adventure. There will be days that leave you feeling like you’ve run a marathon, spilled your lunch in the process, and maybe even lost a shoe along the way. But there will also be moments of pure joy, heartwarming laughter, and a fierce love that only comes from raising a whole crew of little humans who call you mom.

Here are a few bonus tips that I’ve picked up along the way:

• Celebrate the Small Victories: Whether it’s a successful homeschool lesson, a toddler mastering a new skill, or simply getting through the day without major meltdowns, recognizing these achievements brings joy and motivation.
• Embrace the Mess: With little kids around, mess is inevitable. Don’t waste your precious energy stressing about it. Teach your children to help clean up, but remember, a little clutter is a sign of a well-lived life.
• Find Humor in the Chaos: There will be spilled milk, meltdowns in the grocery store, and times when you trip over Legos in the dark. Learn to laugh at the absurdity of it all. It will help you maintain your sanity.

Remember, mama (or papa), you are not alone. There are countless other parents out there navigating the joys and challenges of raising a large family. Embrace the journey and celebrate the small victories. You are doing an amazing job, and your little ones are lucky to have you!!!